6.05.2006

Let's Pick on the Gays Again to Rally the Conservative Base! ---MESS

Why is it the government’s (ANY government’s) business to regulate who I fall in love with and who I want to make a life long commitment to? Judges overturn gay-marriage bans because the judicial branch of our government exists to protect the “little guy” in situations like this. Yes, the majority of Americans oppose same-sex marriage, but minorities have to be protected in a free society like ours. Otherwise, we would still have separate bathrooms and water fountains for black people and women wouldn’t be allowed to vote. I don’t believe that allowing same-sex marriage will have a large impact on our society as most conservatives believe. Heterosexual marriages don’t affect MY life. How will a marriage to my partner affect theirs? President Bush supports DISCRIMINATION and I can’t wait to see him go on January 20, 2009.

5.25.2006

AAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY


TAYLOR HICKS WINS AMERICAN IDOL!
We had Taylor picked from the beginning. The music industry needs some fresh and different talent.
CONGRATS TO TAYLOR!
The soul patrol in action.
Sidenote: McPhee's mom is a big ole mess. Pageant mom to the ninth degree.
YIKES!! Run Katharine RUN!!!

4.15.2006

Project Runway 2.....TRUE WINNER!!!


ALWAYS AND FOREVER A NICK FAN!
So glad to see that Nick and "Where's Andrea!" were a part of the festivities at the GLAAD Media Awards. If you have not attended a GLAAD Media Awards ceremony you have truly missed out. Lots of Absolut Vodka, awards and a chance to mingle and chat with celebrities.
I will never forget my encounter with Rosie O'Donnell. She looked at me and said....."I know you!" I am sure my mouth is still on the floor at the NYC Marriott. LOL!!!

For the record.....the ONLY REAL big ole mess from Project Runway Season 2 was and will always be SATAN...I mean.....SANTINO!! Ewww. Ick. Yuck!! Yup that pretty much sums up Santino in a nutshell. C'mon.....those final outfits from Santino were a mess. Crooked boobs and all.

What were the judges thinking? You can only get so much out of ratings and then you need to keep it real. Just food for thought if the producers are thinking of PR#3.

NICK VERREOS ROCKS!!

4.13.2006

BUCKY GETS BUCKED!!!!


America was a big ole mess....until last night.
Bucky got voted off of American Idol after a horrendous rendition
of Queen's "Fat Bottomed Girls".
Bucky just didn't have the singing chops after the last three weeks and leaving him in the competition would have been another BIG OLE MESS! We won't even talk about that haircut.
Back to North Cackalacki or bust!!!

4.06.2006

Just stop and identify yourself.....much ado about.........NOTHING!!!



Yup. Congresswoman McKinney is a big ole mess. Don't really need to say much here.
Click on the following link to see how a congresswoman can talk in complete circles.
http://www.cnn.com/2006/POLITICS/04/06/mckinney/index.html

We love some Soledad O'Brien!!!
This is sure to be a Saturday Night Live skit and we cannot wait!

3.01.2006

HAPPY MARDI GRAS - Fat Tuesday - 80's style in D.C.






Okay. DJ Jason is not a mess. We think? Although he did have us order 6 "prissy" shots to celebrate "FAT TUESDAY"! The mess was on the dance floor. Men gyrating with men, bedroom eyes through beer goggles and men cutting in line to the bathroom, when the line was cleary in cue. HELLLURRRR!! Madea would have taken her gun and shot the poor bastard dead trying to squat before she did. Needless to say.....Fun was had by all in Washington, DC at Cobalt dancing to the awesome tunes of DJ Jason Royce (who also filled in as lighting tech. The original lighting tech was missing and was last seen on the spotlight at the Crew Club. Hmmm. T.M.I.!! Really!!! Rock on DJ Royce and also for trying hard, really hard, to find a song by George Michael with a cellblock flare. Earlier we were awarded beads by the Green Lantern Angels crew of Coco, Blair Michaels and Miss Lena Lett. Blair was a bit of a B.O.M. but still handle the pole like a true stripper should and Coco was just happy to be watching the bartender on bartender action while Miss Lena Lett bowed to no one. Miss Lett likes a good show of Big Ole Messes and happily entertained the crowd with her antics of "Bitch, you don't know me very well do you! Don't mess with Miss Lena!! WE LOVE US SOME MISS LENA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2.26.2006

TRUE AMERICAN HERO - OLYMPIAN CHAD HEDRICK




Kudos and a shout out to U.S. Olympian Chad Hedrick!!
True to the red, white and blue!
CONGRATS!!

OH NO YOU DIDN'T.....YOU PULLED A BODE!!!

Yup!!
The new catch phrase when you really screw up and lose it.
You pulled a Bode!
Don't Bode!
Beware of the Bode!
You really Bode'd up!!
You Bode!!
Thank you to Bob Costas for calling Bode out after all was said and done! Mess!

2.25.2006

Get a refund Nike....Bode Miller partied too much!!


Nike needs to request a refund for any money that they have paid Bode Miller. What an embarrassment to the USOC. Miller's time in the spotlight is over and we are tired are seeing his mess unfold. KARMA!!

2.24.2006

Sasha Full of Grace


Miss Cohen was outstanding during her short program. The best skating I had ever seen. She was confident, had grace, artistry, strong jumps, and the crowd was with her all the way. However, last night the doubt was in her eyes when she hit the ice. You could tell something was up in her mind. I had this urging feeling that she was going to fall and BAM...she did. Oh well. I am happy she got a silver medal over the Russian and Sasha's fall was definitely not as nasty (See pictures..can we say SPREAD EAGLE with C.T. sticking OUT...ugh!!)! Sasha had the presentation skills to out score her competitor and grab the silver medal. In my opinion, it is so much more satisfying to watch Cohen than it is Slutskya. Irina is just powerful jumps, spins, and arm movements (much like the gold medal men's winner from Russia this year). Interpretation was the key and Cohen got herself together and finished the free skate strongly! Way to go!

2.23.2006

Rap History 101





Excerpt from an email:

Oh...another thing:

"Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks."

Make sure your students know and understand this. It was very important for me, as a 7th grader, to learn those wise words from the venerable Dr. Dre and Snoop Doggy Dog. The quality of rap these days just isn't up to par as it was in the early 90s. You ARE teaching "History of Rap" for at least a week in the spring semester right? I believe it is important for our young ones to feel the power of tracks like "The $20 Sack Pyramid" and "Deeez Nuuuts". THE CHRONIC should be required listening for our junior high students just as THE GREAT GATSBY is.

Ya feel me?

Sippin' on gin and juice,

BMM

Who agrees?

AMERICAN IDOL or AMERICAN DULL? You be the judge


Randy Jackson, Paula Abdul and Simon Cowell.....IT'S A NO!!!
The top 24 could already easily be the top 12. Some of the women were awful and if you thought that was bad, it was even worse for the men.
Seriously, out of the 12 men that sang last night there were only 6 out of the 12 that deserved air time. Huge disappointment. We just sat there and kept thinking what the hell Randy, Paula and Simon actually heard in the auditions.
Hear no evil, speak no evil and say no evil need some hearing aids. They sent the mortician boy home and kept some of the worst singers we have ever heard.
This could be one of the worst seasons of American Idol if this madness continues. Some of the men could not have found a right note if it was given to them on a platter. Speaking of platters, most of the men would not even make it as singing waiters. BIG OLE MESS!!

2.22.2006

Shani Davis.....Shani, Shani, Shani........

Congrats on taking home Gold and Silver. But it is time to...........
LET IT GO!!

Enough is enough and keep Mama Davis out of the papers, please!
What a mess! Be a team player next time. We are so tired of
your whining and lame ass excuses.

From this picture perhaps you should have skated for Italy. The press conference after the race was a mess and having Shani's friends taunt Chad Hedrick was just down right wrong. Having mama davis in Dutch disguise?? We see a Jerry Springer episode in the making here.

Bode Miller....GET IT TOGETHER DUDE!!!



C'mon Bode!! Enough is enough. Now the poor guy is injured from horsing around playing basketball. Is there any end to this story? This picture pretty much says it all. Miller time is done...put down the Miller beer and get back on the slopes and win a DAMN medal dude! We can only hope for the best. These Olympics have been a bit of BIG OLE MESS!!

2.16.2006

PROJECT RUNWAY - SANTINO & THE FINAL THREE

No real shocker here....we pretty much knew that the producers would keep Santino for the ratings factor. The ego, the attitude and downright RUDE comments that Santino has displayed to the judges and other contestants is HORRIBLE!! Mess, mess, mess, mess!!!! The final three SHOULD have been NICK, CHLOE and DANIEL. If Santino is named the winner it will truly be a disgrace to the other designers and to the show. So....here are our final thoughts about last night's revelation.

SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS SANTINO SUCKS

2.14.2006

Olympic Ice Riddled with Snakes

I couldn't help but notice some awkwardness at last night's male speed skating Olympic event. Joey Cheek from the USA won the Gold (hoooray for him!). However, I noticed that everytime a race was over the men would raise back up and BAM!!! ...they had Camel Toe. Their balls were split RIGHT DOWN THE MIDDLE! Photos are below illustrating this phenomenon (wish I had better ones). I did some searching for the "male equivalent of a camel toe" and found this from EyeCandy4You's Xanga Site:

The snake in the blanket is more or less the male version of camel toe. It is when a man's pants are so tight you can clearly make out the outline of his penis and nutsack combo. A snake in the blanket is very sketchy and can create many awkward situations. Use extreme caution when in the presence of a snake in the blanket, or you may die.


DURING race


AFTER race


MESS

Idol Twins are Too Much


Yup. Another post that has to be done!!
Tired of seeing the mess of the Brittenum twins on American Idol.
Enough already!! Bitter party of two. And if the Brittenum twins really know all of these agents that they refer other contestants, why do they need to be on American Idol anway. Please reference wise mothers in the Miller posting.
We are tired of seeing the American Idol promo "My spirit has been broken" and thankfully have less than 24 hours to hear it for the last time. Seacrest In....Brittenum twins out!! You have busted Hollywood. It was 15 minutes of fame and 14 1/2 of those minutes was OVERKILL!!Good riddens!!

Enough of Miller Time in Turino - 2006 Olympics



Big Ole Mess is a huge Olympic fan. It is a little difficult to post this item but it has to be done. Bode Miller is a MESS!! Drinking the night before his first big event, sleeping past the inspection time before the race and then placing 5th in the Men's downhill. If you have witnessed some of Bode's interviews you know where we are coming from. There are tons of people that would love to have a chance of representing the United States at the Olympics. Wake up Bode and get your act together. You can party after you have represented the United States in the proper manner. And a note to remember from some very wise mothers. When you don't know what you are talking about or don't have anything nice to say then DON'T!! We hope that Bode "Mess" Miller pulls it together for the Red, White and Blue!!!!!!!!

2.09.2006

P.R. Dialogue - EPISODE 10

SANTINO: Are these space pants?
KARA: What do you mean?
SANTINO: Because my ass is out of this world!

NICK: I understand what Tim is saying about the suit looking a little feminine, but Daniel is just gonna have to butch it up a bit.

Classic! Love it! MESS.

Terri Hatcher Wears Boy-Briefs!



Good lord honey! What in the hell were you thinking when you picked out this obviously SHEAR dress? We can see every inch of your skinny body! Go eat a Double Whopper WITH cheese girl!! ...and what is up with that underwear? Those are like boxer briefs for a man. The award for Biggest Dressed MESS at the Grammys last night goes to Terri Hatcher!

Kelly Clarkson ROCKS!


Congrats to Kelly Clarkson for her two Grammy wins last night! She was completely shocked when she won the Female Pop Vocal Performance for "Since U Been Gone". She's so genuine! Loved it...tears and all:)

2.08.2006

Nina, Michael Kors and Heidi Klum - YOU ARE OUT!!!



What a f*ck%$# MESS of tonight's episode!!
The judges sent Nick home. When it came down to Nick and Santino, they were the last two standing.
Big Ole Mess has been a longtime fan of this show. However, tonight was a BIG BIG BIG BIG BIG OLE MESS!!!!!!!!!
Santino designed a jumpsuit for crying out loud. One that made Kara look like a sack of potatoes. She looked like she was constricted and could not move. OMG!!! Oh, wait. SHE COULDN'T!! In fact, when she did move her left sleeve popped off and it barely stayed on. The fact that the trim was glued and the jumpsuit was FUGLY. Did we mention fugly!!! SANTINO IS A MESS, MESS, MESS!!! We loved the fact that last year's winner, JAY, stated what we all feel. We hope they can your ass Santino!!

Kara, you should have spoken up!! C'mon GIRL!! Santino is LUCKY as hell to STILL be in the competition. His attitude and his last few attempts at fashion COMPLETELY SUCK!! The fact that the guest judge loved that fugly ass jumpsuit is embarrassing. Shout out to Nick.....you took a risk and at least the outfit you made for Daniel was presentable and nothing fell off.
Yup....it is a reality show but screw the ratings!! IT HAS BEEN MORE THAN TIME TO GO FOR SANTINO!!

Note to Nina, Michael Kors and Heidi Klum...........YOU HAVE TO GOT TO SEND SANTINO PACKING!! He is killing the show and destroying the other contestants.

Nick.....BIG OLE MESS loves you and we say that you are going to come out of the show smelling like roses. You are truly talented, genuine and well grounded. The suit you made for Daniel was great. We hate that the judges did what they did. You were our pick for the final 3. The show without you is just NOT THE SAME!!! The judges are a mess for NOT sending Santino home and yes WE ARE PISSED OFF!!

Hopefully we will meet you one day so you can sign our "Project Runway Barbie".

PROJECT RUNWAY SUCKS WITHOUT NICK!!!!!

2.07.2006

Offending Islam with a Cartoon

If Jesus has a sense-of-humor then why can't Mohammed? These cartoon protests are unreal. I understand that it is highly offensive, to Muslims, to recreate Mohammed in an image, statue, etc. However, why are they killing people over it? Isn't one of the greatest most important Muslim laws "not to kill"...just as it is in the Christian Ten Commandments???

Do these people over in the Middle East have jobs? It seems like they are always protesting, burning flags, blowing stuff up, blowing themselves up, and the like. Do they just sit around all day wondering what they can do next to denounce our Western culture?

Lighten up people! (..and no I don't mean light the bomb).

MESS.

1.13.2006

Cameltoe - Easy as 1, 2, 3

*Cougar model includes a built-in bottle opener

Thank you bspianoboy00 for the CTA update!
MESS!!

1.12.2006

Arrogance Sucks!

For those of you watching Project Runway this season I'm sure you have developed the same love/hate sentiment for Santino that I have. I call him "Santiago" when speaking of him in the derogatory sense. Anyway...I hope he learned his lesson from last night's episode! He's so fucking arrogant! Thinks he knows it all and deserves it all.

He's quite a FUGLY one in the attitude and facial departments. Shave your face man! Jeeeez!

I will give him credit....he's a good designer and very creative, but if anything gets in the way of him winning Project Runway it is his arrogant attitude. I find myself laughing at some of the things he says as well...can be funny...but my favorite on the show is NICK! I hope he wins!


Nick!

He's definitely my favorite to win the show and he keeps SANTIAGO in check! His designs are fantastic. I bet he lands in the top three at least.

Honey...we need to talk about that CAMEL TOE!

MESS!



1.09.2006

Film Critics (MINUS GENE SHALIT) pick "Brokeback Mountain" as Best Picture


"Today Show" film critic (Big Ole Mess) Gene Shalit might want to skip the awards shows for the next two months.

The awards season is in full gear and it is clear that "Brokeback Mountain" is going to continue to shine. Ang Lee was named Best Director and Michelle Williams was a co-winner for Best Supporting Actress.

There were 200 voting film critics. Perhaps Mr. Shalit can watch the film again with one of his peers and get a better understanding of the film.

5 Stars - "Brokeback Mountain"

O Stars - "Gene Shalit of The Today Show"

SHAME ON GENE SHALIT - ONE BIG OLE MESS



You have to see it to believe it!!

Visit www.glaad.org to watch the video of Gene Shalit and
his insane rant against "Brokeback Mountain"

GENE SHALIT IS A BIG OLE MESS!
Queer Eye for the Straight Guy - STAT!!

1.05.2006

We're Back! Oh...and HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Yes...yes...it's been over a week since our last post. We've been on holiday, but we're back! Today was a huge mess cuz I couldn't get myself out of bed! I really wasn't feeling well. I blame it on the Bowl Championship Series and staying up after midnight to watch the ending of the Orange Bowl and the Rose Bowl.

The Orange Bowl could have gone on forever! 3 OTs...whew! At least Penn State and Florida State weren't aiming to break the NCAA OT record of 7 OTs in a game (Ole Miss vs. Arkansas 2003 season).

Good job goes to TEXAS for finally breaking USC's win streak! YAY! the USC quarter back had a FUGLY statement to the media on the field after the game stating that "I think our team is still the better team, but they(Texas) just made the plays tonight and won the game. Ummmmmm...YEAH....TEXAS made the plays and won the game, thus TEXAS is the better team. Cocky bastard I say!

Think of the Juniors (players and students) at USC now. They have been in school since the 34 game win streak started and have NEVER experienced a loss. I bet they didn't know what to do with themselves last night. I love it! Hahaha