SAG AWARDS 2009 - Katie Holmes

We have to wonder if Katie was rushed to the stage as a presenter last night at the SAG Awards. If you were watching you probably noticed that one headlight was pointing down and one headlight was slightly higher and pointing up. It was a big ole mess. Did she forget her wonder bra, was she wearing a bra or does she just need a dozen big macs to go to help her body adjust to her tiny, tiny frame. At least Katie was part of the surprise of the evening when Sean Penn won best actor for "Milk".



Stay tuned to youtube.com for someone to post the smackdown that Ann Coulter got from Barbara Walters, Whoopi and the ladies of the view. Details are still coming out from this bloodbath and by all accounts it was a MESS of an interview. The conservative voice is a good one to have to balance things out but when Ms. Coulter speaks it just seems more hateful than helpful. Not much else to say except when producers book Ms. Coulter they always know to expect a BIG OLE MESS! Something tells us that today was her last day on The View.

Dinner for 8.......Your Table is READY!!

And the back side is a bigger big ole mess. Look closely and you can see that the thread is screaming for help. Poor J. Lo.....we think she might have rocks in the trunk. Could it be that her insurance rates have gone up with her extra large trunk? BIG OLE MESS!! C'mon J. Lo. You gotta bring it (smaller) next time girl. You'll have a diet coke!!

JLo Presents at and Emulates Golden Globes

JLo...Jenny from the block....GIRL! We haven't seen you in quite some time. Yes, we know you had TWINS...that's a great accomplishment. However, for your first major public appearance I wouldn't have accentuated your ginormous birthing hips for the world to see in a golden metallic plunging neckline/halter-topped number as you did last night! Maybe you want a Golden Globe so badly that you dressed up as one last night?? You certainly looked the part! I'm sure if a Golden Globe Bio-epic is ever produced they will definitely call you first to play the statuette part. Messssss...!


Snuggie or Slanket or... NUDDLE?

OK, up until this point I had heard about the Snuggie and the Slanket. I've done some reading on both online. It seems that the Slanket was the original and the Snuggie is the cheap knock off! The Slanket is more expensive, but looks softer and bigger and comes in a multitude of colors. =) QVC has them for a lot less than the www.theslanket.com website.

Now...here's the MESS. There's a third competitor in the market! It's called the Nuddle Blanket. Who in the hell came up with the name of this thing? It's $110.00! Umm...I think Bon Qui Qui would say, "You can have COKE!" The marketable difference between in the Nuddle and the Snuggie/Slanket is that it has "feet pockets" to keep your feet warm. LOL....hell, just put on some damn SOCKS people! Oh, and if you were wondering what the etymology of "nuddle" is: it comes from "nap" and "cuddle". How absurd. NAP + CUDDLE = NUDDLE. It sounds like a gross sex act. "I got nuddled last night!" That just sounds ewwwwww! B.O.M.!!

(I do want a Slanket though! Someone...buy me one or two!)


Noteable BCS Champtionship Facebook Status Updates

WOW...they sure did get the Championship paraphernalia out QUICK...like in SECONDS!

Status updates noticed:

PA thinks OU and Ohio State should play in a bcs game...at least one them would win. Another SEC National Champ!!!

DB says SEC > everyone else.

BS who is the only team to beat the national champs??? hotty toddy!
(My reply: I knew one of you Ole Miss bastards would point that out! =))

TF says BIG 12 huh, what? Bow down to the power of the SEC, friends!!! Gone to bed after a great GATOR and SEC win!!!! MSU fans, loving this offense! Great hire!

DM hopes Mullen brings Tebow with him to Starkvegas!

JW is loving that pitch/shovel option play. Mullen bring that play here! [to MSU]

KH smiles: OLE MISS 31 National Champs 30! Hotty Toddy!
(My reply: Yet another Ole MESS biatch touting this fact...I hate that it's true!!)
(KH reply: "Ole Miss beat Tx Tech that beat Tx that beat OU and Ole Miss beat UF. Case settled, OLE MISS 2008 Natl Champs!"
(My reply: "You F'n WISH!!")

AS is kinda drunk.

TM is National Champions. Love to b a Florida gator!!!!!!!!!

....and my favorite...and the MESS of the status updates:
PM says rooting for the gators equals voting a republican.
(My reply: shut up you whiny Sooner biatch!)
(TP reply: Now you're just being hateful.)
(My reply: him or me?)
(PTP reply: that one must hurt for the okies.)

Congrats to the University of Florida GATORS! CHOMP!

And then there were 4...................

So....we have to wonder if there will be any catfights now that Kara DioGuardi has been added to the 2009 American Idol lineup of judges. Will it be Kara vs. Simon? Kara vs. Paula? Or the best catfight of all, Kara vs. Ryan. They could all be fighting for camera time and mirror time in the dressing room. Time will tell. From the looks of this publicity photo it looks like American Idol 2009 could be a big ole MESS!


Viola Davis for Best Supporting Actress!

Wow! The seventh film I have watched from the "25 Films to Watch Before Oscar Night" is DOUBT. What a great film. It's based on the the Broadway play by John Patrick Stanley. He also translated it to the screen and directed the movie. This film will definitely receive multiple Oscar nominations. My prediction is based on my opinion and upon the various accolades it has already received.

Overall, the cast's acting was phenomenal. However, the standout and scene stealer is Viola Davis who plays Mrs. Miller. She's only on the screen for a mere 18 or so minutes, but it's definitely worth a nod for holding her own and going toe-to-toe with Meryl Streep in the outdoors walking scene to her place of employment. It was visibly cold the day of shooting and the scene is an emotionally charged one. Her emotions were so wrapped up in character that she didn't even bother to wipe her running nose throughout her dialogue. She just left it until the end. I thought it was genius. It may or may not have been a conscious act, but I don't think it really matters. The scene worked. She is GREAT! Check out the scene below.

The Cat Girl that has a Chihuahua

What if you had a college degree and a post-graduate degree (we're talking esquire here people) and lived in a 100 square foot room with two big ass orange/white cats and one doodoo brown chihuahua (that's still using pee pads to defecate and urinate on...missing most of the time) all the while having to sleep in the scent of used cat litter?

What if you lived with a close friend of mine that has endured the messiness that is the 2nd bedroom of the townhouse you both rent?

What if I stayed over one night, while in town, and you weren't there and said close friend opened the door to your room so I could finally understand how horrible the hardly describable smell that lingers out of your room?

Well, if this were you, I'd tell you that you were one BIG OLE STANKY MESS and should know better than to:

A. Not crate a puppy, thus house breaking the poor thing (he is cute....just a product of bad training)

B. Not clean out cat litter boxes on a daily basis (hell twice a day should be more like it)


C. Not offer to repair damages made by cute chihuahua to said friend's belongings immediately

Shame, shame, shame! big, big, BIG OLE MESS....but not as big as J!!


Master Manipulator

I've always felt you were a Master Manipulator, J. What I didn't realize were the extent of your dealings. You've always expressed to me that you are "crazy" and now I truly believe that you are. You need serious help (which I'm sure you realize, but ignore). You played with my heart, my emotions, my relationships/friendships with other people, and most of all my LIFE. The awful thing is that you did the same to a dear friend of mine at the SAME time (we compared notes today). What a fucking cliché. I feel like I'm in an episode of Gossip Girl. You're the Stupid Girl that Shirley Manson sings about in Garbage's hit song from the 90s.

I'm so happy I backed off from you when I did. If I had found out the truth two months ago I'd be devastated. However, now I just feel pity for you. I'm a true believer that people CAN change. Hopefully you will seek help and can indeed change. ....OR maybe some people are just bad apples and you're part of that batch.

What I do know, right this second, that you are indeed a BIG OLE MESS. By far the biggest one of anyone I personally know.


How heinous were those University of Texas band uniforms last night at The Fiesta Bowl? My first Big Ole Mess of 2009 is The University of Texas' Marching Band. Fringe on band uniforms ain't right. Burnt orange (urrrange) is a God awful color too. The combination of the two is painful to the eyes! =)

Another Big Ole Mess from the Fiesta Bowl is Ohio State. Why oh why do you continue to CHOKE in the BCS games Buckeyes? I was rooting for ya.....mainly because the Texas band looked ridiculous and I hate burnt orange.

EW's "25 Movies You Should See Before Oscar Night"

The list of 25 movies to see before Oscar night from EW's list are as follows:

1. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
2. Slumdog Millionaire
3. Milk
4. Frost/Nixon
5. The Dark Knight
6. Doubt
7. Revolutionary Road
9. The Wrestler
10. Gran Torino
11. The Reader
12. Rachel Getting Married
13. Changeling
14. Vicky Cristina Barcelona
15. Tropic Thunder
16. Happy-Go-Lucky
17. The Visitor
18. I've Loved You So Long
19. Frozen River
20. Nothing But the Truth
21. Man on Wire
22. Synecdoche, New York
23. The Duchess
24. Defiance
25. Australia (why is this on the list?!)

So, I've seen 6 of the 25 movies so far. Here's my take on the six:

The Curious Case Benjamin Button was good. I was expecting something profound but didn't get that in the end. It was very Forrest Gump-ish in the way the story was told. I did enjoy it overall despite the 2 hours and 45 min run time. It won't win Best Picture though. Brad Pitt may get nom for Best Actor and Taraji P. Henson (Queenie) for Best Supporting Actress

Rachel Getting Married was good if you like deep family drama with superb acting (Anne Hathaway is really good...should be a lock for a Best Actress nomination.

The Dark Knight was awesome. I loved it. It was a long one but a great ride! Heath Ledger is a shoe-in for Best Supp. Actor Oscar...might get Best Picture nomination.

Wall*E....my favorite by far. I hope it will get a Best Picture nomination. I don't think people realize how much goes into making animated movies these days. The first 30-40 minutes of Wall*E are dialogue free and it's just beautiful. Who would've thought that 2 robots and a roach would be so entertaining. Of course it will win Best Animated...something is seriously F'd up at the Academy if it doesn't!

Milk....really moved me. I had no idea about Gay history...this is Gay History 101. Sean Penn can play anyone...he's a chameleon....he's the male Meryll Streep. He should win Best Actor...and this will get nom for Best Picture...go see it!!

Slumdog Millionaire.......loved it. The way the story is told is very cool. I believe what has captivated most American audiences with this film is learning how life is in India. I know that not all of India is slum-ridden, but wow....I had no idea. The directing is quite amazing and with large a large extras cast it must have been very challenging to coordinate all the large scenes. Slumdog has won most of the critics Best Picture and Best Directing awards....not sure if Oscar will give it to them though. If it does win it will be a triumph for a Bollywood movie. Everyone should see this.

Next on my list is Doubt. I see it tomorrow night.


So, it's been 3 years since my last blog post. WTF! This blog is getting resurrected! I'll go ahead and call myself out for being a Big Ole Mess for not posting in EONS. I've been inspired by my friend who shared his blog with me last night. It's a private blog, but I forgot how much fun (and therapeutic) it is to write. I'm getting back to some things in life that I like! So, here goes!